Poor understanding of seasons of one’s life is the reason a lot of people are disgruntled and dissatisfied. Sadly, no one really teaches us these things early enough. More times than not, we have to enter entirely new seasons and hit brick walls before we realise that we cannot attempt to maintain previous lifestyle in this new season.
This is also why many matrices for success may not be applicable to you. I’d rather follow principles than follow matrix.
You might have heard people say,
“If you want to be more valuable, read at least 1 book per month.”
This is a matrix.
Now, while one book per month is…basic, it might not be feasible for you based on your season of life.
However, reading books is a way to add value to yourself. So, one a month might not work, but one in 2 months should. Then stay committed to it.
But, what you’ll see often is people compare their seasons with other people’s season or their own previous seasons.
Statements like, “When I was in school, I used to fast 14 days every month, read 5 books a month and pray for 6 hours everyday. These days, I struggle to pray for 3 hours. It’s like l’ve backslidden.”
Whereas, you’re now a father with 2 children who need your presence, a full time job where you’re the manager, a marriage that needs to be tended to amongst other demands. You don’t have the luxury of those matrixes.
And that’s why planning becomes important.
Simply because your realities changed is no excuse to relax and dwindle. You need to plan.
If you don’t plan, you’ll find out that your new season becomes a very good excuse to give yourself and anyone who cares to ask as the reason for your retrogression.
How can I show up efficiently and manage the many hats I now wear?
I give all my earnings to church work. Now I have a wife and kids, how can I manage my finances to be able to still give to church work without keeping my family hungry?
I can’t afford to read 3 books a month but can I make sure I read 1? I work 6-8 daily, how can I maximise my weekends so I can make up for lost time with my family? What needs to leave for now so I make time for what’s most important?
I have a friend I look up to and admire. The person is always sharing motivational stuff, quotes and videos that prompt you to take action, get results, impact your space etc.
One day, I was listening to a motivational speaker the person recommended and the speaker said something in the lines of, “When you have a vision, don’t let anything hold you back…blah blah blah”.
That day, it occurred to me that this was not the voice I needed in my life at this point.
I was in a season of utter confusion and internal despair. I was ‘lost’ and trying to find my feet again. I wasn’t sure what direction life was pulling me towards. And someone is telling me to not quit on my vision. Goodness gracious, I don’t have a vision to start with!!!
At that season of life, I didn’t need motivation on how to “ignore the naysayers and keep grinding.” I needed direction on how to rediscover myself and hear God for my life’s direction. I didn’t need an angel to advice me to STOP listening to both that friend and the advises…till further notice.
Life is in seasons. Every new blessing might usher you into a new season. Marriage. A new baby. Another baby. A new job. A new city. Folks coming to live in your home. A new business. Etc.
It’s left to you to figure out the demands of this new season, recognise the new demands and priorities of this new season, acknowledge and accept the fact that things have to change. And absolve yourself of the guilt of not doing things the way you used to before.
I’m rooting for you! Happy New Year!!
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