A Heart Cry

white notebook and pen

Dear Amanda,

Today, I woke up with a weary and heavy heart feeling unlike any other day. There’s a gaping hole within me, searching for something to fill it up. Amanda, these times have been harsh. The more I’ve sought fulfillment, the wearier I’ve become. Today, like many other days, I felt a cold longing, simply yearning to pour out my thoughts to the Lord.

You may wonder why I’m reaching out to you like this. It’s because perhaps you, too, are experiencing droughts or yearning for restoration and reconnection with the supreme God. If this resonates with you, Amanda, my prayer, as penned in my journal today, might be the prayer you need to utter.

So, Amanda, unlike any other day, I’m not writing to advise you or share my joys or sorrows. Instead, I’m offering you a glimpse into my prayer diary so you know you’re not alone. I share these prayers not to showcase my piety but to encourage you that prayer is like a conversation—open, honest, and needing only brokenness, sincerity, and an expression of your heart’s intent.

The fountain of your pleasure is found in the sacrifice of my shattered heart before you. You will not despise my tenderness as I bow down humbly at your feet.

Psalms 51:17 TPT

Today, Amanda, I expose to you the vulnerability of my heart. I open it up so that you may glimpse from where I find solace the most—within the pages of my dear God’s diary. My sincerest hope for you today, Amanda, is that as you read or pray through my prayer, you find the courage to speak the very intent of your heart to God. If you find yourself struggling for words, may my prayer serve as an inspiration for you.

Dear God,

Mercy Jesus, Mercy Jesus, mercy, mercy, mercy, oh God, I’ve missed you. God, I’ve missed you. God, clear the intent of my heart. Jesus, purge my heart and let it be like yours. Draw me closer to you. Please help me to do your will. Please help me to be like you. Cleanse me and make me strong. Let my life be drawn to you. Let my heart be drawn to you as I lift it to you. Let my hands be holy and acceptable before you.

Lord, my imagination is weak and weary. I have lived my life according to what I think my thoughts and feelings should be. Break protocols and images in my heart. Restore my heart to you. Draw me closer to you. Let my heart be like David’s, always seeking you.

Jesus, I’m tired of relying on myself, tired of living by principles, tired of worshiping you based on my feelings. Lead me, Lord. Lead me. Let me be guided by you alone.

I’m tired of living in past glories and pretending to be strong when I’m weak inside. Let my soul, my heart, my body be for you. I’m tired of living for myself. I’m tired of walking in alignment with my feelings. Lead me, Lord. Lead me. Let me walk with you.

Break down the walls in my heart, Jesus. Break them down. Open my eyes, open my heart. Please help me to live for you, to dwell in you. Let the love of Christ dwell in me. Let me walk by faith, not by my feelings. I live for you, Jesus. I am sold out to you. I am seated with Christ.

I no longer live in myself but in Christ. I am filled with the love of the Father. I live a joyful life. I am loved. I am loved. Thank you, Jesus.

[Journal Extract- March 13, 2024]

Until we meet again, Amanda, stay strong in faith.

P. S- Amanda represents anyone feeling emptiness or needing more.

Warm regards,

Written by Mary Ifeoma Nwanua

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  1. Thank you for sharing such a personal piece of your heart. It encourages a reflection on our vulnerabilities and the strength in expressing them to God. This prayer is profoundly touching and raw, It’s a beautiful reminder that in moments of deep longing or weariness, turning to prayer can offer solace and a path toward renewal.

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